May 24, 2014
Click here for the full written transcript of this podcast episode.
I used to be extremely, painfully shy.
So shy in fact, that I would literally hide in my bedroom when we had visitors to the house, and my parents were forced to coax me away from my fantasy novels to merely come out and make brief eye contact with our visitors…
…before I disappeared back into my bedroom to go back to my novel.
As you learn in my new book, I also thrived on hamburgers and pizza – and my version of a salad was iceberg lettuce drenched in ranch dressing.
But I'm no longer that way, and now I not only podcast, but I also love to speak and engage socially, and actually get paid to travel around the world and talk to lots of people about how to change their fitness, health and lives!
My guest on today's podcast is Jordan Harbinger (pictured right), who wrote the article “The Sweet Potato Sex Link – The 10 Best Foods and Supplements For Your Love Life“, who has a knack for helping guys just like me to build the skills and confidence necessary for social success.
Jordan has always had an affinity for Social Influence, Interpersonal Dynamics and Social Engineering, helping private companies test the security of their communications systems and working with law enforcement agencies before he was even old enough to drive.
Jordan has spent several years abroad in Europe and the developing world, including South America, Eastern Europe and the Middle East, and speaks several languages. He has also worked for various governments and NGOs overseas, traveled through war-zones and been kidnapped -twice.
Jordan will tell you – the only reason he’s still alive and kicking is because of his ability to talk his way into (and out of), just about any type of situation. At his website, The Jordan Harbinger Show, Jordan shares that experience, and the system borne as a result, with his students and clients.
During our discussion in today's podcast, Jordan and I delve into the realm of body language, personal habits, and social confidence.
-What kind of body language mistakes that fit people with nice bodies make which hold them back socially…
-How to reprogram your brain to actually like and appreciate things like kale smoothies and ginger juice…
-A simple eye trick to get you to “fake it until you make it” with extreme social confidence…
-Why bars and clubs are not necessarily the places to go to to enhance your social intelligence and ability to build relationships…
-How I went from eating fast food, being ultra-shy and reading fantasy novels to being named as one of the world's top 100 most influential people in health and fitness…
-And much more!
Do you have questions about body language, personal habits, and social confidence? Then leave your thoughts below and either Jordan or I will respond!
I think this is the most obnoxious guest who has ever come on the show. For a "professional charmer" this dude does nothing but talk about himself and comes off as a super sleazy used car salesman. I just wanted to yell, "Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up" at the podcast Skylar White style.
LOL. I do appreciate the feedback!
You bet. If I didn't love your show, I wouldn't have bothered to comment. Keep up the good work.
I really enjoyed the podcast Ben. I want to give you a round of applause for mentioning introversion near the end of the podcast. I think the book you were trying to think of was "Introvert Power, Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength" by Laurie Helgoe, Ph.D.
I'm an introvert and I think its important to inform your listeners that there is a difference between shy behavior and being an introvert. I think a good place to start is with the Myers-Briggs Personality test. A person can be an extrovert and shy or they could be an introvert and not behave in a shy manner. There is all sorts of combinations.
The book you mentioned is great. Here are some more books that I found helpful in understanding my introversion.
"Introvert Power, Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength" by Laurie Helgoe, Ph.D.
"The Introvert Advantage, How to Thrive in an Extrovert World" by Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D.
"The Introverted Leader, Building on Your Quiet Strength" by Jennifer B. Kahnweler, Ph.D.
"Successful Selling for Introverts" by Thomas Murphy
"The Successful Introvert, How to Enhance Your Job Search and Advance Your Career" by Wendy Gelberg
"Why Should Extroverts Make All The Money, Networking Made Easy for the Introvert" by Frederica J. Balzano, Ph.D.
"Networking for People Who Hate Networking, A Feild Guide for Introverts, The Overwhelmed, and The Underconnected" by Devora Zack
It would be great if you could do a podcast on introversion with one of the authors. Go over personality types and other topics around shyness and introversion.
thanks for the great articles and podcasts.
This is awesome! And I remembered the name of the book I was trying to remember: it was this one – QUIET: The Power of Introverts in A World That Can’t Stop Talking.
Hey Ben
what can I say, your a wealth of information when it's comes to fitness, nutrition and general well being. Thanks for bring in great guests, educating our minds to new possibilities of doing things differently and helping us through the process. You remind me of the poem (short version) of how we all can make a difference in the world,
'Pebble in the Water'
Drop a pebble in the water: just a splash,
and it is gone;
But there's half-a-hundred ripples
Circling on and on and on,
Spreading, spreading from the center,
flowing on out to the sea.
And there is no way of telling
where the end is going to be….
Keep up the great work :)