The Wake-Up Lounge, Italian Dinner Feasts, Travel As Education, “FU” University & Other Massively Important Parenting Principles With Patrick and Laurie Gentempo (Boundless Parenting Book Series).

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Patrick and Laurie Gentempo are dear friends of mine, superstar parents, world-changers, philosophers, entrepreneurs, and a featured couple in my upcoming Boundless Parenting book.

The parenting habits the Gentempos shared in the book were incredibly unique, including a “Wakeup Lounge,” during which their kids would get up in the morning, come into the family room, sit in a comfy chair or couch with a warm blanket with a log on the fire, meditative music on in the background, incense burning, and a warm drink in hand. It’s an environment of peace and harmony where they start the day together. Sometimes they’ll talk about the day. Sometimes they’re quiet and just chill together. This goes on for 20-40 minutes, passing from sleep to the waking state, ready to start the day from a harmonious proactive state as compared to jolting into action and flying out the door with stress.

The Gentempos also hosted Sunday Italian dinners for their children. The smells and rituals that surround this still impact them and their kids to this day, and infuse them with joy and memories as it now does for their children who have entered adulthood. They believe travel is the best education you can givey our children and they have taken their own kids all over the world, based on the view that experiencing other languages and cultures and landscapes broadens their thinking and actions and bonds a family through having those experiences together.

Beyond wake-up lounges, Italian dinners, and travel, the Gentempo's thrive on certain parenting premises, such as…

  • No child was ever made good by telling them how bad they are
  • One of the best things parents can do for their children is to love each other
  • Children learn more by example than by words
  • How a child starts their day is critical
  • Family rituals are a building block of a child’s adult life
  • The most important education a child gets is outside of school
  • Self-esteem and self-confidence are job one
  • Integrity must be consistently on display

You get the idea. These are fantastic parents, and we get into these concepts and many others on this podcast.

So who are the Gentempos?

Dr. Patrick Gentempo is known as the “Philosopher-Entrepreneur.” Along with his wife Laurie, he is the co-founder and CEO of Action Potential Holdings, Inc. Patrick is also co-founder and host for Revealed Films, Inc. a company that produces documentary series reaching millions of viewers worldwide. He has keynoted hundreds of presentations around the world and is the author of the Wall Street Journal and USA Today best-selling book, Your Stand Is Your Brand.

Early in his career as a practicing chiropractor, Patrick co-developed innovative diagnostic technologies and received multiple patents.  As the CEO of his diagnostic technology company, he grew it to over 8,000 clients on 6 continents. A healthcare activist, Dr. Gentempo has given testimony to Congress and to the White House Commission on Complementary and Alternative Medicine advocating for an array of healthcare issues.

Dr. Gentempo’s distinctive perspectives have captured worldwide attention. His TEDx talk, “Unleashing the Power of Philosophy,” received spirited accolades. A guest on numerous programs and podcasts, his views have also been published by Forbes.com. As Dr. Gentempo likes to say, “Everyone has a philosophy, the only question is whether they know it or not!”.

Laurie Gentempo, along with Patrick, is the co-founder of Action Potential Holdings, Inc. Through that organization, she helps guide and co-create projects that align with her values and have an impact on the world. Laurie recently became a director of the Gentempo Family Foundation, a non-profit dedicated to various facets of personal and global healing. Laurie’s passions include meditation and creating a life she loves. The Gentempos live in Park City, Utah.

During our discussion, you'll discover:

-The Gentempo family and their morning routine…10:05

  • 3 kids 
  • Laurie created and developed Wake-Up Lounge
    • Win the morning, win the day
    • Morning rush vs morning coming together
    • Incense burning and blessing the home
    • Music and fire
    • Sitting together, ordering drinks like at a lounge
    • Affirmations
    • Sometimes talking time, sometimes quiet time
    • Doing breathwork as a couple, quiet time, and sometimes discussing spirituality
  • The environment can shape your experience of life
    • A ritual of creating an environment of peace and harmony
  • Teaching the kids to prioritize their spirits, souls, and bodies before they jump into the day

-The Gentempos unique parenting approach: premises, values, and purpose…18:58

  • Premises, values, and purpose are related to each other
  • Patrick’s work as a practical philosopher
    • Patrick uses the branches of philosophy to sort the thoughts out and create a congruent way to approach life
  • Each category of life has premises, values, and purpose
  • A premise is a belief element that is driving your choices and actions
    • Integrated into our subconsciousness
    • The importance of being consciously aware of them
  • Having premises is a good approach toward life and parenting as well
    • Ask yourself – What are my premises? What do I believe in? What are my values?
  • Dr. Nathaniel Branden – Patrick's mentor said “no child was ever made good by telling them how bad they are”

-Rules for parenting…22:38

  • 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos by Dr. Jordan Peterson
  • One of the best things parents can do for their children is to love each other
    • Consciously make an effort to connect with your spouse – time away from kids, regular date nights
    • Makes kids feel safe because their parents are bonded and in love
  • Children learn more by example than by words
    • Importance of living by example
    • More is caught than thought
    • Kids pay more attention to what you do than what you say
  • Contradiction can lead to destruction

-The importance of family rituals…29:05

  • Rituals anchor kids to a happy childhood
  • Smells and aromas create emotions and wonderful memories
  • Family gatherings, family dinners, one-on-one dates with kids

-The education premise…34:49

  • The most important education is outside of school
    • Institutionalized education, in general, does not really set kids up for success
    • Exposing children to different countries, cultures, languages, learning about the world
  • The Gentempo family experienced private schools, public schools, and homeschooling
  • Is it good to homeschool?
    • Conversation with Richard Rossi
    • The most important thing kids need to develop in their life is self-confidence
    • When they go to school, is their self-confidence being built or destroyed?
    • Da Vinci Education 
  • Every person has some genius in them – special gifts and a purpose in this world
    • Genius refers to passion, potential, something they’re born with, a gift to the world
    • It should be discovered and developed
  • Podcast with Jon Butcher
  • Ikigai 2.0 
  • Threadless

-How did you help your children to make money from their own art?…47:37

  • How the Gentempos support their children
    • 25-year-old has a degree in finance and economics (dual major), works as an analyst but is also working on stock photography for Instagram
    • 21-year-old daughter is into music but has a daytime job (barista); enters competitions as a barista for latte art
    • 18-year-old son is into trading – instead of enrolling in college, they enrolled him in a day trade course
  • From a young age, keeping engaged in what they're good at, what they're passionate about
  • Letting them build their lives around things they can do that bring them good feelings
  • Visualizing a future that brings them the life they want and making plans to achieve it

-Why the Gentempo kids had to read Atlas Shrugged, the second most influential book after the Bible…54:06

  • Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand 
  • A fictional story expressing the application of philosophy in life – “philosofiction”
  • It’s an achievement to finish the book and actually understand and digest it
  • If kids read the book and pass an oral exam, they get $500
  • It helped shape their thinking and gave them confidence in their thinking

-How to get kids involved in meditation practice…58:05

  • Joe Dispenza as an inspiration and guide
  • Meditation as a solid way for parents to keep their sanity
  • Meditation is all about creating your own space in the mind, soul, and body; to have a coherent brain and heart to live your life from
  • A seven-day-long Dispenza meditation retreat for the whole family
    • They had the experience, and felt the energy of it, a chance to start practicing it themselves
    • Teaching them how to bring that practice into their life
  • Age appropriateness of the retreat
  • Dr. Joe's Weeklong Advanced Retreats

-An excerpt from the book: Don't subjugate your inner knowing to external experts who don't know you, your values, or your child…01:03:07

  • It’s important to have premises and values but one must find them on their own
  • Teach kids how to think, not what to think
  • It's very concerning when parents substitute their own judgment and instinct with an expert’s judgment
  • If we know our values, purpose, and premises, we can read a book and take the best out of it
  • Use your own mind and judgment but improve yourself by learning from other people
  • Think and feel, trust the intuition
  • Choose the stuff that resonates with you

-And much more…

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32 Questions For Boundless Parenting

The following questions were posed to Patrick and Laurie Gentempo, and the rest of the wise parents interviewed for my upcoming book, Boundless Parenting.

  1. How many children do you have, how old are they, what is their profession or passion, and why, in particular, are you proud of them?
  2. Are there any elements of your parenting approach that you would consider to be particularly unique?
  3. What books, systems, models, or resources do you rely heavily upon or consider to be indispensable in your own parenting?
  4. What traditions, habits, routines, or rituals are most important, memorable, or formative for your family?
  5. What rites of passage or significant moments of maturation to adolescence or adulthood have your children experienced, if any?
  6. Who do you look up to as parenting mentors?
  7. What have you taught your children about raising their own children?
  8. Do you have any philosophies or strategies for educating your children outside of traditional school, such as homeschooling, unschooling, self-directed education, or other alternatives, creative, or “outside-the-box” forms of education?
  9. What has been your proudest moment as a parent, and why?
  10. What do you wish you had known before first becoming a parent?
  11. Have you ever experienced imposter syndrome as a parent? If so, how have you coped with that?
  12. How have you achieved a balance between mentoring and passing on wisdom without “living vicariously” through your children?
  13. Have you ever faced any big parenting decisions that kept you awake at night worrying or that you feared you would mess up?
  14. What do you regret, if anything, from your experience as a parent?
  15. What is the biggest mistake you have made as a parent?
  16. What, if anything, from your parenting experience would you go back and change or improve?
  17. If you had multiple children, what did you think was right at the time with one child that you then went back and changed with the next child or future children?
  18. Have you ever sensed or feared that your children would grow up too different or weird as a result of any “outside-the-box” parenting approaches you used? If so, how did you deal with that?
  19. Have you ever differed from your spouse on parenting principles, techniques, or approaches? If so, how did you manage that?
  20. Warning: This question is long but important: As a parent, have you ever felt conflicted about wanting to share a book, teaching, resource, or method with your children as a means of impacting their future success, but feared that it might “overload” them, especially at their age? If so, how did you balance bestowing this valuable knowledge to your child without causing them to worry too much about adult concerns? How did you decide when to just “let a kid be a kid” versus nudging them towards responsible adulthood and the attainment of valuable wisdom?
  21. How have you balanced being a present, engaged parent while preserving your own identity, taking time for your own self-care, tending to your career, or pursuing other interests that did not include your children?
  22. How have you engaged in one-on-one time or created space for dedicated time with your child, especially if you have more than one child?
  23. If your children have grown up and moved out of your house, what strategies have you found most helpful for maintaining and building your relationship with them?
  24. If your children have grown up and moved out of your house, do you often miss them, fear for them, or think of them? If so, how have you coped with any loneliness or desire for their presence?
  25. Do you have non-negotiable rules for your children?
  26. How have you disciplined your children, if at all?
  27. How have you helped your child to establish responsibly, moderated, or conscientious consumption or use of books, media, entertainment, screen time, and social media? This is not my favorite question because the focus on “limiting screen time” seems a bit blown out of proportion these days and I think causes kids to get obsessed with the “forbidden fruit” of screen time, but it seems to be on the minds of many parents today, so I’d be remiss not to include it.
  28. Have you emphasized or encouraged any health, fitness, or healthy eating principles with your children? If so, what has seemed to work well?
  29. If your child or children could inscribe anything on your gravestone, what would you hope that they would write? What would you most want them to remember about you?
  30. What do you most want to be remembered for as a parent?
  31. What do you think your child or children would say is their fondest memory of being raised by you?
  32. What message for parents would you put on a billboard?

Click here for the full written transcript of this podcast episode.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Patrick and Laurie Gentempo:

– Podcasts:

– Other Resources:

Episode sponsors:

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Do you have questions, thoughts, or feedback for Patrick and Laurie Gentempo, or me? Leave your comments below, and one of us will reply!

Ask Ben a Podcast Question

3 thoughts on “The Wake-Up Lounge, Italian Dinner Feasts, Travel As Education, “FU” University & Other Massively Important Parenting Principles With Patrick and Laurie Gentempo (Boundless Parenting Book Series).

  1. Christa says:

    Why do you recommend this magnesium? Is it synthetic? Magnesium is best taken as Sally Fallon recommends it. I take Azomite Mineral Powder in water.

  2. Anima Martins says:

    You talked about morning rituals and evening rituals, these are so important- before the school I had a time called mum’s time where we just cuddled and read books and other times did nothing, just cuddled I believe these times prepared them for the day. In the evening we had a thanks giving time. Also we had Friday night we had special meal, cake and movie. Anyways enjoyed this podcast very much, thank you.

  3. Anima Martins says:

    I love this episode of podcast. Your parenting is similar to what we did. We travelled with our children all over the world. We homeschooled our children while the concept of homeschooling was foreign in India. My husband thought that we want our children to learn what we think is important not the Government. We wanted our children to love God and love others and be all that God made them to be. We were not in a place to buy curriculum so I created my own. I was fearful how my children would turn out. But I am happy to let you know that they are functioning in their innate God given abilities and supporting themselves through their creativity and tallent. I am glad I was not crazy after all.

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